Have you ever noticed that no matter how wicked a person was in his life, he becomes a saint at his funeral? In reality, he was a bad father, but at his funeral he becomes a great father in the eulogy given by his estranged children. In reality, he was a bad husband, but suddenly, he is a great husband. In reality he was a very bad person, but suddenly everyone talks about what a good person he was. He was never in church, but suddenly he is a great Christian man. The minister strains awkwardly to speak glowingly about the man he didn’t know and hardly ever saw. In life, he was primarily noted for his wicked works, but suddenly upon his death he is known as a man of many good works. Have you ever noticed how people who never spoke too flatteringly about their lost loved one in life suddenly can’t speak highly enough about him at his funeral? They say glowing things about him that they never said about him during his life. In short, they lie. There are more lies told at funerals than perhaps at any other occasion, and that’s the way people want it. If the minister did anything other than lie, the family and friends would be outraged.
God is the only one worthy of a eulogy at a funeral, but no one offers a eulogy to God. Instead, they offer lying eulogies for the sinner who is likely in hell at that moment. Think about that. The sinner has already arrived at his permanent dwelling place in hell. He is weeping and gnashing his teeth and writhing in agony in the flames. He is begging for just one drop of cool water for his tongue, but receives no mercy. God is not impressed with this wicked man. God sees no good in him. The inhabitants of hell are not impressed with him. They don’t care about the time he helped an older lady across the street and the time he gave money to a charitable organization. They don’t think he is or was a good person. They don’t like him and want nothing to do with him. And yet at this very moment, on earth, in a church or funeral home somewhere, the man’s family and the minister are talking about what a wonderful person he was and how he has gone to a better place!
Have you ever noticed how no one goes to hell – at least no one you know? When have you been at a funeral at which the minister and family didn’t conspire together to convince themselves and everyone else that the departed sinner was in heaven? Jesus taught us that the road to heaven was narrow and said that few find it. Conversely, he taught that the road to destruction was broad and that many were on it. Yet, according to our funerals, Jesus was wrong. No one is in hell. Everyone is in heaven. Ever noticed how all you have to do to get to heaven is die? Instead of believing in justification by faith alone, most people believe in justification by death alone. Death is all that is necessary to be transformed miraculously from a depraved wretch into a shining angel. Why do we do this?
Why do we lie? Ministers often do it because they are afraid not to. Many lie because they are false prophets who deceive people and a funeral is the perfect opportunity to say “peace, peace” when there is no peace. Some family members lie because they are grasping for some piece of comfort in their loss. But consider: Is grasping at a lie truly comforting? I suspect most people play this game of falsehood for selfish reasons. If they eulogize the deceased, then they will also feel better about the state of their own souls. If the departed sinner went to heaven, then they will surely go to heaven when they die as well. If everyone is a good person and going to heaven, then we don’t have to worry about our own spiritual condition. We hate death. We hate to be reminded of our weakness and our fleeting time here. We don’t like to think about what happens after death. We don’t want to consider that there might be a hell, and we certainly don’t want to hear that most people go there. We don’t want to ponder those realities, but funerals force us to do so. So we fight back against death and reality by laboring hard to convince ourselves that everyone who dies goes to heaven.
What does it accomplish? Nothing. Is God deceived? No. Will our lies change God’s mind? No. Will our lies help us get to heaven easier? No. I am not saying that I think ministers should stand up at funerals and declare with certainty that the departed person is in hell. But, when the person’s life gives us little confidence that he or she is in heaven, it would be far better to remain silent about the eternal destiny of the lost one than to boldly declare that the person is in heaven. Oh for some honesty in our days!
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