I could not sleep all night. I wasn't just nervous, I was being constantly interrogated. The interrogators acted as though they had caught some international spy group. They made a big deal of it for several nights of questioning.

This is the fate of North Korean people in this land, where we receive worse treatment than animals, just as though we were in North Korea.

During the process of questioning I knelt to my questioners and begged them, "Please do not send these people back to North Korea. It is all my fault."

But they said, "What's that to you or us? We have an agreement with North Korea, we will have to send them back. We have nothing to do with whether they live or die, and we really don't care."

At that time I was four months pregnant. Endangering the life of my child, I did not sleep for several days because of the intense questioning. At one point I even fainted. They thought I was faking it and began to scream at me. When I awakened I was in an office. My lips were dry and chapped, my face was pale.

I heard someone say, "Better be careful, we are going to kill her." They took me into an office to give me some basic medical treatment. My spirit revived and I tried to talk sense to the authorities.

"Look, if North Korea were economically sound and had a measure of freedom like in here or in South Korea, would North Korean refugees come here, leave their own country, and face dangers like this? If these people go back to North Korea they will die! Please don't send them back, even if they have to stay in this prison for several years."

I told you there was an eight-year-old girl among us. The Chinese police gave her candy and delicious food. Carefully they asked her where and how did you meet these people?

She exposed everything.

The police suggested to me the next day, that there was only one way to stay out of prison. "Bring money, and you will be free." These out of court settlements, quite common, were negotiated with me because I am a South Korean citizen. The six North Korean prisoners received no such offers. They were sent back to North Korea and their fate is unknown to this day.

"How much?" I asked.

"100,000 yuan ($19,000) will free you and your husband."

I borrowed a phone and explained to a friend our situation. He got the money and gave it to them. But after it was received, they only released me, and demanded $30,000 more for my husband.

Shortly after my release, I lost my baby. And I didn't know that since I was pregnant I didn't even have to go to prison. They were just using me to get money.

My husband stayed in prison. I was speechless, defenseless. And I was expelled from the country after this.

My husband got no trial. His imprisonment has been the darkest time in my life. All my money is lost. My heart aches constantly, even now, thinking of those six people. I can hardly sleep. I did everything I could to stop refugees from going to North Korea, and to free my husband, but the police took the money and kept my husband. There is no justice in this. There is no humanity in this. There is no conscience in this.

I hope the South Korean government will aggressively take care of this ongoing defector matter. Perhaps quiet diplomacy is not going to solve this problem.

Oh yes, I talked to my husband last week...for ten minutes.