He is a weary man, enslaved to his work, troubled by cases that seem impossible to solve. At night, he comes home to his wife who has become indifferent to him and his fixation on his career. She hardly speaks a word to him, neither he to her, yet they coexist. The loss of joy in their relationship begins to gall him, especially when he begins to notice that his presence seems bring a type of chill over her when he comes close. As much as this distance bothers him, he is still driven by one particular case in which he cannot possibly fail as a child psychologist. As much as it strikes him as macabre, it intrigues him that the boy can see dead people. He works with the boy relentlessly, until he discovers that the reason the boy can see him, is that he himself is dead. He remembers that he had been shot in the stomach by a former patient, and had died, yet his spirit still roamed his former home. With force it comes home to him that the chill he brings to his wife is more than just relationship-deep—she is living alone and he assumes nothing has changed. But he is dead. Upon this realisation, he is gripped with a sense of urgency to communicate a final message to his wife, which she receives, and he is then released into what lies beyond the state in which he is trapped between life and death.
It surprises me, as a biblical counsellor, how many people, hurting in grief, entertain such ideas. How widespread is the presupposition that after a loved-one dies, that their soul is still present, as portrayed in movies such as The Sixth Sense (1999). For many, they take unusual phenomena in their home as evidence that their departed loved-one is communicating with them, and they interpret those phenomena. Sadly, I've never encountered such a person who has been absolutely convinced that their “final message” from their beloved is unmistakably clear, nor does it bring them relief from their agony of loss. Some are even terrified by what they interpret as ghostly activity in their homes, and are driven into a state of exhausted paranoia.
Out of all of the ways I could respond to this in this blog, I would like to simply share this. Others may consider it an encouraging idea that the nonphysical component of their dear departed friend or family member remains close by, “looking down upon them”, or “present in everything around them”, but I don't find even a small degree of hope in that. On the contrary, were that notion true, I would find death overflowing with disappointment. For a start, no individual can ever find peace through interpreting the wellbeing of their departed loved-ones in this way because there is no final authoritative source of information on this. Clearly, none exists. These ideas cannot be proven to be true. Further, it is a most unfortunate prospect to be trapped in such a morbid state, depending upon the world of unobservant living people to interpret your broken glasses and lost keys.
But most of all, these wrong ideas are sad because they not only miss, but deliberately and aggressively ignore the glorious, joyful, dependable truths of the gospel of Jesus Christ. As I consider the people whom I have known and loved in my life, who have now died, I have an authoritative source of truth, upon which to depend, regarding their current state. The believer in Jesus Christ has ultimate steadiness in what he knows to be true. In the very instant that a believer dies, and they are no longer present in their physical body, they are gloriously transported face-to-face with their Redeemer. (2 Corinthians 5:1-10, especially verse 8) In severe opposition to the numberless theories that you are still living with a ghost, the gospel brings you truth that is personal, dependable and joyful. There is nothing that brings me personally more joy in the face of harrowing bereavement than knowing that my loved-ones have been dearly loved by Christ since before the creation of the world, that He purchased them deliberately with His own blood, and that He has now taken them home to glory unspeakable. Nor will anything less bring you lasting peace.
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