THE WELL, a drama in four scenes

cast of characters:

Stage Manager (SM) who doubles as “Jones” the bartender

Mary Shales , a very poor middle-aged woman, whose life revolves around “The Well”.

Sally Cummings, Mary’s friend

Joe, a regular at “The Well”

Dave, a street preacher

Secretary to Doctor Hill

Doctor Hill, “head pastor” of a large traditional Church

Pastor Sharp, pastor of a small Pentecostal group

Sharp’s friend

Stage Manager enters with hammer, nails, and large sign on which are printed the words : THE WELL. He nails the sign to pre-arranged boards, then speaks to the audience:

SM: ...and with those hammer blows we open to the neighborhood another one of those public places where people go to drown out their troubles with high-spirited drink, and acquaintances in similar situations. (people are entering as he speaks) Spotlight! (he speaks to spotlight operator) focus on this lady, here, will you (indicating Mary)? Mary Shales is out for another fun Saturday night. Her friend is Sally Cummings. Let’s join them.

Scene 1: at “The Well”

(general chatter/laughter in background)

Mary: (at the juke box) Which one do you want to hear first tonight?

Sally: Doesn’t matter, I’m sick of ‘em all. Just get some noise goin’.

Mary: (puts money in, heads for bar) Let’s get some other things goin’ too. Bud Lite, Mr.

Jones.

Jones (SM): Now you take it a little easy tonight, Mary. Don’t want to have to send you home.

Mary: Oh come on, Jones, when’s the last time I overdid it?

Jones: Last night.

Mary: Oh yeah...(she takes drink to table)...Well, let’s start the party, boys!

Joe: Okay, sister, what’s your game?

Mary: (in her best “uppety” voice )Uh, why not bridge? (she laughs) You know my game, Joe, deal the cards!

Jones (SM): So the cards are dealt, the drinks flow, the music blares. Some time passes, and Mary staggers to the bar...

Mary: Hey Jones! Ish gettin’ a lit’l hot in here.

Jones: Same temperature as when you came in, Mary. Maybe it’s gettin’ a little hot in here.(he indicates Mary’s person)

Mary: (responds to Jones’ comment, then:) Ha! Full House! I wish my third husband could see this!

Sally: I thought it was your fourth husband that was the card player.

Mary: Oh yeah, but it wush my third husband that wush money hungry. Fork it over boys! (they do) That callsh for another drink. (she goes to bar)

Jones (SM): Mary, why don’t you quit while you’re ahead? You know you can’t hold this stuff!

Mary: (drunken but still good-natured) ah c’mon Jones! I have my rightsh! Just one more?

Jones: One more, and that’s it!

Mary: (taking drink to table, drinking as she goes) Okay, gang, deal ‘em again!

Joe: No way! You’re too lucky tonight. And I’m broke. (others concur)

Mary: (now a little upset) Whaddya mean? You afraid of a woman? Shome man you are! (she is getting louder) What’d ya come for if it washn’t to play poker and loosh money? Jonesh, thish man’s dishcriminatin’ against me!

(Here Jones (SM) shakes his head, gets Mary’s coat, puts it on her, and guides her to the door as she keeps protesting. Sally understands, and assists Mary through the door to the street)

Sally: Let’s go home, Mary.

(as they go into the street, they meet Dave, a young street preacher who at the moment is

counselling a boy from his Bible. Mary , still very much drunk, begins to ridicule.)

Mary: Hey look, a real- live preasher! (to Sally:) Good-lookin’, too.

Sally: Mary, you’ve got to get home. You’re drunk.

Mary: Oh come on. I’m jusht havin’ a good time.

Dave: (suddenly turning from his counselee, who moves on) It’s okay. Did I hear that your name is Mary? I’m Dave. (extends his hand)

Mary: You want to shake hands with a drunk? And you even asked about my name! You’re the first preacher that’s ever done that.

Dave: I see you’ve had some rough times in religion.

Mary: Yeah, really. I’ll never forget the firsht time I went to see a preacher. I’d just been to this huge church meetin’ down at the stadium. I did what they said to do. I walked down that long aisle, bowed my head, prayed...

Dave: ( nods knowingly) Why don’t we sit down here?

Mary: You know, you’re nice. I mean really different...

Dave: Thanks. Now, continue your story.

Mary: Shtory? Oh yeah. Well, I goesh to this church uptown, after the stadium meeting, to follow up, you know?

( black out)

Scene 2: Doctor Hill’s Office

(a flashback)

Mary: (enters speaking to secretary) H-hello, I’d like to speak with the man in charge.

Secretary: The man in...Oh, you must mean the head pastor, Dr. Hill?

Mary: I guess so.

Secretary: (goes to pastor’s office) Jerry, there’s a woman to see you.

Dr. Hill: Who is it?

Secretary: I don’t know; she walked in off the street and said she wanted to talk “to the man in charge.” ( they both chuckle )

Dr. Hill : ( a little bothered by it all) Okay, send her in.

Secretary: You may go in now.

Mary: Thank you. (she enters)

Dr. Hill: (professionally) Hello, I’m Dr. Hill; I’m head pastor here; what can I do for you?

Mary: (very nervous, intimidated) Well, uh, I’d, uh, kinda like to be a member here. I saw your sign, that said “everybody welcome,” and thought this would be as good a place as any.(she attempts a laugh , which is not reciprocated)

Dr. Hill: (combining amusement with disgust) Tell me, why are you out church shopping to begin with?

Mary: (a little excited but still worried about his gruffness) Well, last night I was at this big meeting down at the Stadium. After the preacher preached and called everybody down front, I felt inside like somethin’ was changing, you know? I had this great feeling. Now I just want to join a church.

Dr. Hill: Uh- huh. Well, I don’t want to be rude, but you know you could get a “good feeling” by taking a hot shower.

Mary: Huh?

Dr. Hill: (rising) What I mean is, a person can’t just go to a “meeting”, get a good “feeling”, and consider himself a Christian. There’s just more to the Church than that.

Mary: Oh? What?

Dr. Hill: Oh, there’s hundreds of things. For example, what is your stand on

Trans-substantiation? What are your millennial views? Are you a “predestinarian” or do you favor “free will” ? What about baptismal regeneration? I mean, you just can’t come in off the street feeling good, and expect a pastor to open the doors of the Church to you.

Mary: I can’t?

Dr. Hill: You obviously don’t understand. I’m trying to tell you, there’s more to Christian teaching than, “Jesus come into my heart.” (mocking tone)

Mary: (stunned, but rising) Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know. (she begins to walk out)

Dr. Hill (suddenly the comforter) Well, it’s understandable. Don’t feel bad about yourself.

Now, I have here (reaches inside desk drawer) a listing of our main doctrines, with short

explanations of each. It’s about 35 pages long. You read it, and if you’re still interested, come back, and sign up with the secretary for a catechism class. Now, after about two years of weekly classes, we can talk about membership again.

Mary: Two years?

Dr. Hill: About.

Mary: Well, thanks.

Dr. Hill: Oh, no problem. We’re here to help people.

Secretary: (as Mary is slowly walking off stage) Oh, Jerry, the lawyer has called again. You know that apartment complex we own over on High St.? There’s about three tenants he says we’ve got to run out of there. They’re consistently a week late with the rent.

Dr. Hill: (barely audible now as Mary is already gone and the scene is changing) Hey, we’ve got to do what we’ve got to do.

(blackout, as we return to SCENE 1)

Mary: So I say to myself, to (she coughs here) with religion. Just a bunch of phonies.

Dave: So you dropped religion from then on?

Mary: Should have. But I’m pretty soft. And I wanted to give the religion folks a fair chance to prove themselves. A few weeks later I was on my way to the store when I sees this big notice. This church in Rose Park is goin’ to have a big-name preacher. Miracles, music, and a friendly welcome to everybody. Maybe I just like excitement; or maybe it was the “friendly welcome” part. But I went. Well, it was exciting! And after the meeting...(blackout)